Navigating teenage emotions: a guide for parents

Supporting your teen’s journey to independence

Whether it is navigating social expectations, considering the complexities of friendships and relationships, or seeking to balance their academic responsibilities with a social life, teens must balance many emotional highs and lows.

“As teenagers grow, they naturally begin to test boundaries and seek greater independence. This is an important part of forming their identity,” explains Fiona Gontier, Head of Senior School Wellbeing.

According to the Raising Children Network, giving teens many opportunities to lean into their desire for independence supports them in developing important life skills, building confidence and feeling more connected.

During this stage, it is also common for teenagers to have specific needs, and as carers, for us to support these needs:

• Seek extra privacy: Respecting their need for personal space nurtures trust and encourages more open communication.

• Prioritise peer relationships: Friendships offer emotional support and a sense of belonging, which are important during adolescence and beyond.

• Explore their identity: Feeling accepted by parents plays a vital role in their emotional development and self-esteem.

• Seek adventure and fun: “This is not defiance,” explains Fiona. “It reflects how the teenage brain is wired to pursue new challenges and to explore the world around them, so we should gently and responsibly support them in this pursuit.”

1. Practical ways to help teens manage emotions

1. Recognise the importance of sleep

“Teenagers need between eight and a half and ten hours of sleep each night to support brain development, emotional regulation and academic performance. Chronic sleep deprivation has been linked to increased anxiety, depression and poor concentration,” says Catherine McCraith, Head of Senior School Culture.

A Black Dog Institute Future Proofing study found that teens experiencing sleep difficulties were four to six times more likely to show symptoms of anxiety or depression.

To support healthy sleep habits, parents can:

• Encourage screen-free time: Aim for at least an hour without devices before bed to help the brain wind down.

• Promote consistent routines: Regular sleeping and awake times help reset our body clock and improve sleep quality.

• Create a calm environment: A quiet, dimly lit space can help signal to the brain that it is time to rest, assisting with winding down.

• Model good sleep hygiene: Teens are more likely to adopt healthy habits when they see them practised at home.

2. Support teens through challenging emotions

“Navigating challenging emotions is a normal part of adolescence,” explains Fiona. “As parents we can help our children to feel safe and supported as they ‘feel’ their feelings,” she says.

The Black Dog Institute emphasises that early, empathetic responses from caregivers can strengthen a young person’s ability to manage stress and build resilience. It is more important as a parent to acknowledge how they feel rather than to solve all your teen’s problems for them.

“Parents and carers don’t need to feel they have all the answers for our children. Just being present is the most important thing you can do. Try hard to listen without judgement. Acknowledging your child’s feelings can be really comforting and can help to strengthen your relationship,” says Fiona.

3. Nurture parent-teen connections

Teenagers thrive in environments where parents are warm, consistent and flexible. According to the Australian Institute of Family Studies, strong parent-teen relationships are a key protective factor in fostering emotional resilience, self-esteem and responsible decision-making.

Catherine explains, “You can build this connection through small, consistent actions.”

To strengthen your relationship with your teen, consider:

• Creating shared rituals: Activities such as movie nights, gym sessions or hobbies can build trust and closeness.

• Be curious: Showing curiosity about your teen’s world, for example their fashion preferences, music or gaming interests, demonstrates genuine care.

• Celebrate achievements: Recognising and celebrating both big and small successes reinforces your teen’s sense of self-worth.

• Set clear boundaries: Involve teens in decisions around curfews, chores and responsibilities. This teaches accountability and responsibility.

• Respect privacy: Simple gestures like knocking before entering their room help maintain trust while still providing guidance and support.

• Keep reaching out: There will be times when your teen does not seem to notice your efforts to connect with them. Even if they do not respond to you, keep offering opportunities to connect so they know you are there to support them.

As Maggie Dent, parenting educator and author of Parental as Anything states, “Teens need parents who are a safe base — who are warm, consistent and willing to let go gradually.”

4. Seek help

Please seek support for yourself or your teenager if you have questions and concerns, particularly if they are about mental health or safety.

Guidance and support are available through the School and health professionals.

Finally, says Fiona, “Remember that parenting a teenager is a balancing act. It involves a delicate balance between letting go and holding on.”

Useful resources

Kids Helpline A 24-hour service for young people needing advice and counselling.

Supporting students’ wellbeing Tips and advice from Haileybury’s wellbeing team on how to support your child’s mental and emotional health.

Black Dog Institute An Australian medical research institute that investigates mental health from childhood to adulthood.

Beyond Blue A 24-hour Australian mental health and wellbeing support service.